Why Does My Child Have to Give Valentines to All the Classmates? (2024)

It's that time of year again! Valentine's Day is fast approaching and you've opened up your child's backpack to find the dreaded class list and directive to make sure everybody gets a card. If you're like many parents, you're groaning and wondering why your child has to give a Valentine's Day card to everyone. Here's the answer to that question and five more common questions about Valentine's Day at school.

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Children Giving Valentine's Day Cards to Everyone in the Class

It may seem as though it's going overboard to give cards to the entire class and your child may even complain about giving cards to kids he doesn't like, but the reasoning is simple enough. Giving cards to everyone is the best way to avoid hurt feelings. If your child expresses concern about giving cards to everyone, don't dismiss his concerns, but do make sure he understands that it's not negotiable.

If You Can't Afford to Buy Valentine's Cards

Talk to your child's teacher, preferably before you mention it to your child. Most teachers will have a creative solution to this problem. In my years of teaching, I always had parents who sent in their children's leftover cards "just in case."Many teachers are bargain shoppers and pick up boxes of Valentine's Day cards on clearance every year to stow away for just such situations. Or your child's teacher may be able to send home the materials to create homemade cards. Another option is to print Valentine's Day cards from online resources.

Does My Child Have to Address and Sign All the Cards Himself?

This really depends on how old your child is and whether or not his fine motor skills are up to it. By the time children reach late elementary school (3rd, 4th, and 5th grade), they should not only be able to address and sign Valentine's Day cards but also keep track of the class list to make sure everybody has a card.

In kindergarten, your child may be able to sign his own name to the cards and trace over his classmate's names if you pencil them on first. First and second graders are most likely able to address and sign all the cards but may need to do them in batches over the course of a few days.

Why Doesn't My Child's School Allow Valentine's Day Celebrations?

There's no one reason that schools don't allow Valentine's Day celebrations, but there are a few common themes, including the concern of the impactValentine's parties and candy can have on children with food allergies. Other issues may be:

(1) Parties and cards exchanges can be disruptive to the learning process. It's very hard to get anything accomplished if students are anticipating a celebration or recovering from one.

(2) Not all students' religious beliefs include Valentine's Day and celebrating it in the classroom can be considered discriminatory.

(3) Valentine's Day is perfect fodder for bullying, clique behavior and hurt feelings, even if the "everyone gets a card" rule is enforced. Instead of providing the opportunity to send cards with nasty messages or to make fun of certain types of cards, some schools ask that Valentine's Day celebrations and exchanges take place off school grounds.

What Should My Child Do for the Teacher on Valentine's Day?

Take your cues from your child. Ask him: "What do you want to do for your teacher on Valentine's Day?" If all he wants to do is give her the same type of card he's giving all his classmates, that's fine. If he wants to do something more extensive, that's fine too. Teachers don't (or shouldn't) expect their students to give elaborate gifts. After all, Valentine's Day is traditionally more about love than appreciation!

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Heart-Healthy Valentine's Day Party and Food

Since February is alsoAmerican Heart Month, many classrooms are having healthier celebrations. Instead of cookies, cupcakes, and punch, parents can send in more creative Valentine's Day treats.

Some of the more interesting ideas I've seen include: watermelon slices cut with heart-shaped cookie cutters; strawberries cut in half (they look like hearts); bagels with cream cheese mixed with a few drops of red food coloring; heart-shaped mini-muffins and melon cut into the shape of flowers.

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Why Does My Child Have to Give Valentines to All the Classmates? (2024)

FAQs

Why Does My Child Have to Give Valentines to All the Classmates? ›

Most teachers and etiquette experts we spoke with indicated that it is usually recommended to give every student in the classroom a valentine, especially if your child is passing them out at school. Doing so teaches your child to be inclusive and keeps kids from feeling alone or isolated.

Why should we not celebrate valentine's Day in school? ›

Valentine's Day has been considered a bad influence on children so most schools do not allow children to celebrate this day with their friends and teachers. This day is considered a distraction from learning according to school authorities and parents which will leave a negative impact on children.

What is the dark truth about valentine's Day? ›

One Valentine was a priest in third-century Rome who defied Emperor Claudius II after the ruler outlawed marriage for young men. St. Valentine would perform marriages in secret for young lovers, ultimately leading to his death.

Are you supposed to get your kids valentines gifts? ›

Yes, giving your child a Valentine's Day card or treat is a lovely thing to do. Those who include their children in Valentine's Day tend to go all out on presents and special meals and messages of caring and kindness. "We have little presents and special dinner," says Stephanie M. "My little boy calls it Love Day."

Do kids give parents valentines? ›

To many, Valentine's Day is no longer about celebrating your significant other – if you have one – but your relationship with just about anyone, whether platonic or familial. In some families, it's now standard procedure to exchange Valentine's Day cards between parents and children.

Do kids still give out Valentine's at school? ›

Most teachers and etiquette experts we spoke with indicated that it is usually recommended to give every student in the classroom a valentine, especially if your child is passing them out at school.

Why is Valentine's Day important for students? ›

Regardless of age, Valentine's Day is an opportunity to teach children about love. Love comes in many shapes and sizes. It is a complicated topic that is hard enough for adults to understand. However, there are a few ideas about love that many can agree on.

What does the Bible say about Valentine's day? ›

1 John 4:7-12. Dear friends: let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

Does the Bible say about Valentine's day? ›

Since the origin of Valentine's Day as a romantic holiday only dates back to the 14th century, the Bible doesn't have any specific messages about the day—but it does have a lot to say on the subject of love.

What is the black code in Valentine's day? ›

Black: Healing from a Rejected Proposal

Black might be a favourite of many, but on Valentine's Day, it symbolizes rejection. You just got your heart broken because of a rejected proposal. Wear a black outfit to portray your state of mind. It's alright to take time off and heal.

Do dads buy daughters valentines gifts? ›

Many dads do use Valentine's Day to express love for their daughters as well.

Do dads buy daughters valentines? ›

Many fathers give their daughters gifts for Valentines Day. It's not weird. It's a personal choice. You are saying “I'm your Dad and I'll always love you”.

Should you celebrate Valentine's Day with your kids? ›

Valentine's Day is a great opportunity to teach children the value of expressing love and appreciation for others. Also, celebrating Valentine's Day with your children can create special memories and traditions that will last a lifetime, and these traditions can become an annual part of your family's celebrations.

What are the disadvantages of Valentine's Day? ›

Cons of Valentine's Day:

One of the most common critiques is its commercialisation. As Valentine's Day approaches, advertisem*nts inundate airwaves and social media platforms, promoting extravagant gifts, lavish dinners, and romantic getaways.

How is Valentine's Day celebrated in school? ›

Celebrating Valentine's Day with Letters of Kindness

February is the month of kindness. Focus on being kind by writing kind letters to classmates. These letters can be tied to the curriculum by focusing on friendly letter writing skills. The teacher can assign students in pairs to write letters to each other.

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